


My Knight, My Ghost

by solohux



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Established Relationship, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 15:31:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13193076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solohux/pseuds/solohux
Summary: After returning to theFinalizerfrom Crait, Hux wonders whether Kylo is the same man that he once fell in love with.





	My Knight, My Ghost

**Author's Note:**

> _kylo-is-my-bad-bae said to solohux: Tlj prompt: what if Kylo and Hux had been in a relationship, but Kylo is overcome by rage and vengeance (as he clearly is in tlj). Hux realizes that Kylo is no longer the man he loved when he force chokes him in the throne room, before claiming the title of Supreme Leader. I’m imagining this leading into something like your darkest Kylo AU_
> 
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> A prompt from the beautiful [@kylo-is-my-bad-bae](http://kylo-is-my-bad-bae.tumblr.com/) which got a little longer than I anticipated so I decided I'd post it here! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> **Very angsty stuff ahead! Kylo Ren is not nice!!**

The night that they return from Crait is one of the roughest of Hux’s life.

Not only has the Resistance managed to escape their grasp _again_ but with Snoke gone, the First Order are leaderless. Or, so Hux had thought.

The _Finalizer_ awaits them in orbit around the mineral planet, ready for the arrival of its two co-commanders, two men who _share_ the burden of command and who _both_ rule over an _equal_ share of the Order. Yet, Hux is being summoned to Kylo’s chambers so _formally,_ as though he actually believes that he can take over Snoke’s position at the helm of their organisation. Hux straightens his uniform before making the short journey over to the Knight’s room, reeling at the thought of what awaits him.

He coughs, groaning as his throat burns from the damage caused by Kylo’s Force-choke.

Whilst on his knees in front of the new Supreme Leader, the tears in Hux’s eyes hadn’t been from the pain of the choking, nor the mourning of Snoke’s sudden death, but the sting of betrayal and heartbreak of having his _lover_ threaten his life with the same fingertips that once caressed Hux’s body with the promise of loving him forever, a ghost hold around his entire being that silently gave Hux the reassurance that Kylo was just as much in love with him as he _is_ with Kylo.

_Was._

The _new_ Supreme Leader does not like to wait. This, Hux knows, but surely, he thinks, Kylo does not _actually_ believe that he can rule. The only training that he’s had that would _remotely_ aid him in this situation would be that of vicarious experience beside his mother in the New Republic. Hux turns his nose up at the thought, knowing that it’s likely that Ben accompanied Leia to meetings and gatherings, learning only through _her_ about what is takes to be a political ruler.

Kylo Ren is _not_ a politician. He’s a Jedi, primarily. He’s a Knight, a Force-user with a lack of patience and has irrationality in _bucket loads_. Hardly the leader that the prestigious First Order needs at the moment, not when they’re so close to becoming the second Empire. It’s not how they discussed things; when lying in bed together, with their fingers intertwined and Kylo giving Hux soft kisses all over his body, they spoke about what they would do once Snoke outgrew his usefulness. Hux, with his military training and ability to both lead and strategize, would be the _Emperor_ whilst Kylo, with his astounding strength and profound intelligence both on the battlefield and through the Force, would be the _Hound._ Two men governing the galaxy in unison, one behind the lines and one leading from the front. Equals, partners, _lovers_.

Seemingly, Hux thinks, Kylo no longer wants that—and maybe he no longer wants _him._

Giving three reserved knocks to Kylo’s door, Hux swallows hard, growing more and more nervous as time passes with no answer. Though, when the door _does_ slide open slowly, Hux almost wishes it had stayed closed.

Kylo casts a strong silhouette in the doorway, his bare torso shining with sweat as though fresh out of the shower, adding a glisten to his abs and chest. His trousers hang low, barely covering his stomach, sitting just above the beginnings of his pelvis. Already, his eyes look impossibly dark and, already, Hux knows that the man in front of him is not his _lover._

“You summoned me,” Hux states.

“I did.”

Even Kylo’s voice doesn’t strike the warmth into Hux’s heart like it once had. It’s _cold,_ empty, like he’s addressing a stranger and not his lover.

“You don’t have the _authority_ over me to do that.”

Kylo smirks. “Never stopped you before.”

Hux opens his mouth to reply with something _witty_ but nothing comes, because Kylo is _right._ Never before has Hux hesitated in visiting Kylo upon the latter’s orders. Going to Kylo’s chambers is like going to his own, _home,_ where his troubles of the day will be forgotten as soon as Kylo’s arms are around him or when their lips meet in a soft kiss. They’ve shared meals in here, candlelit dinners where the company has meant more than the fine foods. Hux knows the warm sheets of Kylo’s bed like the back of his hand, having slept in them possibly more than he’s slept in his own. There’s a shelf in Kylo’s refresher that holds a small selection of Hux’s soaps and shampoos, his shaving gel and his toothbrush. Early signs of cohabitation that Hux _ecstatic_ to think about; Kylo is his _moons_ and his _stars,_ the reason he gets up and fights for a better galaxy.

The _beast_ in front of him is not that same man.

“I summoned you because I sense your doubt,” Kylo says, beckoning Hux further into his chambers, further into the lion’s den. “You don’t believe in me.”

“I believe in you more than anyone else ever has, Ren,” Hux says, keeping his hands behind his back, striding past Kylo with falsely confident steps. “More than your mother. More than Skywalker. Even more than Snoke.”

The door hisses closed rather loudly, and for the first time in his _life,_ Hux feels unnerved in Kylo’s presence, scared that he's alone with him. 

“But you don’t believe that I should be our Supreme Leader,” Kylo says.

“No,” Hux replies, bluntly, finding courage to look into Kylo’s eyes. “I do not.”

“You think it should be _you._ ”

“ _No._ ” Hux takes a step closer to Kylo. “I think it should be _us._ ”

Kylo seemingly flinches at Hux’s words, taking a step back when Hux reaches out to cup his cheek, leaving Hux’s hand lingering in the air with nothing to hold. His hip twinges with the next step, bruising covering his entire left side from Kylo’s recent Force-throw, the same bruising on his neck from the choke.

“We talked about this, Ren,” Hux continues. “We knew Snoke would, one day, become null to our plans and he’d be killed. We’d assume the throne _together._ Two halves of the same crown.”

Hux can almost see it; both he and Kylo standing on a balcony, dressed in matching black uniforms with _matching_ golden crowns upon their heads. It’s the dream that Hux has thought about in his darkest hours, reminding himself that this is the future that awaits them on the bright horizon. It’s the dream that’s quickly becoming Hux’s _worst_ nightmare: losing Kylo.

“The power is _mine_ ,” Kylo replies after a few silent moments. “I am Snoke’s next in command. The First Order needs a Force-user to guide it. Not a Force- _null._ Weak. The Resistance needs to be annihilated and the Jedi along with it. You can’t achieve that. _I can.”_

Hux’s chest quivers.

“Don’t shut me out,” Hux whispers with a gentle shake of his head. “Ren. Let me help you. We’re a _team._ I love you—”

Hux gasps as he’s thrown backwards, skidding across the floor to land on his already-bruised hip. His wrist twists this time too, and he holds it against his chest as he looks up at Kylo.

“I don’t need your love anymore, General,” Kylo says, raising his hand. Hux’s body is forced to his knees, his head being forced to bow in front of his _leader._ “I need your hate to _fuel_ my power.”

“ _Kylo,”_ Hux groans, trying to lift his head. “This isn’t _you._ You’d never—”

“I can’t fail again,” Kylo growls, wrapping the Force around Hux’s throat. “You’d only betray me. _Like everyone else.”_

“ _No_!”

Hux cries out when Kylo releases him, flopping onto the floor with a cough, heaving for breath _again._ It can’t end like this, not with Kylo bringing harm to him over and over again in the name of the First Order. They’re lovers, _soulmates—_ Hux had once believed—, so how could it possibly end in a way that means them _hating_ each other?

“Goodbye, General,” Kylo stands towering above Hux, who can’t find the strength to move off the floor. “I expect nothing but _merciless_ work from my new subordinate. Your emotions govern too many of your decisions. _Let the past die._ I’ve killed mine. Maybe it’s time you killed yours.”

Hux’s shoulders tremble with his cries, palms on the floor and still on his knees, but bites his lip just enough to look up at Kylo, finding a yellowness to his eyes that chills Hux to his core.

“Never,” Hux says. “The past will keep me fighting.”

Kylo smiles, cupping Hux’s cheek in a cold gesture, “Perhaps I should kill it for you.”

“That’d mean killing yourself,” Hux says, blinking his tears away, already partial to the belief that Kylo Ren is dead. “And I’d never see harm brought to you.”

Kylo’s lip curls into a frown, obviously frustrated by Hux’s refusal to hate him, but Hux smirks. As long as he keeps his love for Kylo alive, his Knight will never fully turn against him.

_Right?_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, and my darling fandom friends for showing me so much love and support! ❤️
> 
> My tumblr is [@solohux](http://solohux.tumblr.com/) ❤️


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